Writing Issues

I didn't do my normal Friday post yesterday- sorry. I've been slacking a little with the blog lately. It's not only because of school but also just due to the fact that I CAN'T SEEM TO WRITE ANYTHING. I haven't worked on the WIP in so long I feel like I'm starting to lose it.... (By which I mean both lose my love for the story and lose my mind) I left off in the middle of a scene and I have no idea how it ends or what happens next. I know what happens in 40-50 pages through the end, but the middle is actually proving difficult... I've had horrible thoughts of abandoning the project and working on something else, or maybe taking an extended break from it... I just hate that I'm 30k into it and can't seem to finish. The idea of starting at zero on something else and having to get all the way up to 30k again makes me want to crawl into a ball and cry.  So basically this post is just an excuse for me to whine. Great :P

I also thought of maybe trying my own modified NaNoWriMo where instead of writing 50k of a new novel for National Novel Writing Month in November, I tried to write at least 1k every day of this stagnant project and do 30k in a month. But I really don't think I could do that and the thought of epically failing scares me.

There. I admitted it. I'm scared of my book. I'm scared because it sucks and I think on some level my real fear is that I'll finish the draft and then not be able to fix it. I've never done a real revision before and IT SCARES ME SO MUCH. Also, I have this prevailing fear that the idea and the whole concept is stupid and bad and shallow and not worth it. I don't know how to get over that, and I feel like as long as I can't there's no chance of making it into a good book.

Alright. Now I'm just rambling and depressing myself more. Anyone else have writing problems? I can empathize :)

I'll try to post more this week, too. I have some thoughts on writing I've been meaning to write up a post about, as well as a new TV show I'm obsessed with and can't wait to rant about. Have a good weekend!

- Nicole

Busy Summer is Busy

Today is one of those days where I have SO MANY THINGS I want to get accomplished and all I want to do is sit in front of a fan ('cause as you probably know it is really, really hot out) and read a good book (like Wither by Lauren DeStefano which I reread this morning!) and not focus too hard on anything. But that would be too good to be true . . .

My goal was to finish a novel this summer, however since I'm taking a break from the old project to work on something I just started, that won't happen. Nevertheless, I know school is going to be insane for me this year and I really need and want to be far into this new project by the time the first day rolls around. And yeah, that first day of school? August 31st. WTF people?

Also, my grandma is coming to visit tomorrow! She lives in Australia and I haven't seen her in three years, so I'm so excited!! But it also means I've been cleaning and organizing and other unpleasant things for the last week :( And it means I'll have less writing and reading and blogging time . . . and less homework time.

"What?" You say - homework?? Yup. Not only do I have the normal "read a book and write a short paper" thing for English (which won't be too bad) I have to read a 600 page biography of John Adams and take notes for a test on the first day of school for AP American History. Can you see me banging my head slowly against this desk? AND I have math and lot's more English work online that takes hours and hours of staring at a screen. It's like they want us to spend our summer inside on the computer. Hypocrites ;) So yeah. That's my life in a nutshell right now. How's yours? :)

- Nicole

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