Thursday and Friday were my first two days of 11th grade. It's going to be my hardest year, I can tell. I have AP classes and a full course-load and a lot of obligations. And that's okay. If there's one thing everyone who's ever been to high school can agree on, it's probably this: High school is a really hard place to be yourself, and high school is a really hard place to be happy. With the people (friends, acquaintances, etc.) I'm around a lot there's a kind of shared mentality that basically goes "Holy crap we're pretty smart but this is so hard we're gonna fail this sucks so much we can't do this OMG OMG I can't believe we have this much homework . . ." going on a loop through our heads. Or hell, maybe just my head. But probably everyone's.
Friday was my first day of creative writing class, my elective this semester. I knew no one else in the class, but I wasn't that intimidated 'cause at least I'm a junior. And the class is taught by one of my favorite teachers EVER, my sophomore English teacher. (I've been really lucky with English teachers in high school :D). So the environment was comfortable even if my fellow students weren't. I knew two things going into the class: A) it was really, really work-intensive, B) it was a workshop class and required students to share a lot of their writing with the class. As a high schooler who has a hard time being herself, I almost didn't take the class just because of that.
We had to write a short piece and share it during the first class. Four people opted out of sharing. The vast majority did though, and I'm proud to say I did too. It was kind of a cool moment. Nobody shouted "that was awful!" When I was done. It wasn't the end of the world. I didn't pass out. I guess in that class for once we all had a different attitude towards ourselves and each other. I wish it could be like that all the time. But it made me hopeful for the rest of the year. Sure, it's going to be hard and stressful at times. I can do it. I can be brave . . . sometimes. That's good enough for now.
There's your dose of random musings and ramblings for the day ;)